Are You There, Castiel? It's me, Dean Winchester
by jamie-is
Summary: (S04 and beyond - minimal spoiler) Destiel. Dean/Castiel. Dean's having reoccurring nightmares about Hell that won't go away, they're filtering into his day-to-day life and he can't finish a case. But Castiel's there to help him sleep.


_Hi, my first fanfic, It took me a while! But I'm excited to share, so I hope you enjoy. (p.s. not so good at the lovey dovey stuff, mostly cause I have Dean in my head as so manly! but comment with how I can better myself and whatnot) Much appreciated._

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Strung up like a piece of meat - which is all he really is down here - screaming, but he doesn't feel anything, just old scars burning. Flames surround him and old flesh slides off charred wounds until Dean's eyes slam open to a dusty old motel room, his fist wrapped around the wooden handle of his knife. Looking over to Sam's bed, he see's he is asleep, Dean jolted into a sitting position as he see's Castiel.

"What the hell, Cas?" Dean eyes the darkness.

Cas replies confused, "you called me..."

"I was sleeping, i didn't call anyone," Dean says curtly. He continues before Castiel can say anything else, "well, I better get ready for the day. Still dark out? My favorite time to wake up."

"No, go back to sleep," Cas answers and vanishes.

Dean kicks his legs over the bed and rubs his face into his hands. He stands to walk over to the bathroom, falling on his face. He flips over and sees chains that Alastair had him in wrapped around his ankles, panic arising he shut his eyes fast, when he opened them again the chains are gone, he shuffles to the bathroom quickly. He hopped in the shower and when he got out Sam was awake and putting on his boots.

"There's a case," Sam tells him, "this house. Alright, check it out, it's like every time a family moves in they die their third night, I mean it's always unexplainable. The family looks like they've been set ablaze and burnt to death but theres not sign of any fire on the house...just them."

"Sounds good, i'll get dressed and we can go"

On the way to the house Dean turns to Sam and asks, "hey, do I talk in my sleep?" Pursing his lips, Sam sat for a moment thinking and responded, "yeah, I guess only recently, since you've been back from...back from hell..."

Dean pushed his thoughts away and paid attention to the road. When they arrived at the house it looked normal, like any old house. The police tape in the door didn't stop them from getting a peak inside. Some furniture, some unpacked boxes, and not a sign of any fire incidents. They walked around looking for clues, only sure it was the right house because of the police tape and unpacked boxes.

They ran their usual tests and Sam suggested they get going because they're "not gonna find anything here," just as a woman walked over to them, she let out a scream. They went to shoot her with their shot guns but she disappeared, showing up by the curtains with a lit match, setting them up in flames.

The flames from the house fill Dean's nostrils with a terrible smell, with his eyes he sees a plain old house, but he starts to get dizzy as he smells burning hair, cooked intestines, and ashy skin. As he begins to smell Hell.

"Dean? DEAN? Are you alright? Wake up!" Sam's yelling as he shakes Dean awake. Dean's eyes open slowly, blinking a bit he asks, "wha...what happened?"

"Uh, you fainted. It was weird, since when do you faint, man? I had to drag you out of the house! Anyway, get up. Why don't you head back to the motel and I'll clean this mess up," Sam reassures him, "I'll find out who this ghost is and go burn her bones."

"No, no, I'm fine, I can do this wit..."

"I'm dropping you off at the motel, Dean"

Dean didn't feel like arguing and felt shitty anyway, so he obliged. When he got back to the motel, he waited for Sam to leave and walked over to the bar next door. "Cas, are you there? I could really use some advice," he prays, "..c'mon don't make me..." and if cut off when he walks straight into the angel, bumping off him. "Jesus, Cas."

"What about him?" Cas looked confused, but Dean just flashed him the 'effing angel's' face. Cas continued, "you said you needed advice? On what, your ptsd of Hell?"

"How did you..."

"Know? I told you, you called out to me in your..." Cas' voice dropped, unsure, "..sleep."

Dean thought for a minute, they entered the bar and Dean order two shots, "but I only said your name? Or did I mention what was happening?"

"You only said my name, but I just knew. Tell me Dean, what's troubling you, why is Hell coming back?"

"I have no idea, it just started happening recently, its getting worse. It was just in my dreams, now, back at the ghost house me and Sam were looking into, Hell entered reality." Dean took both shots, "it's really messing me up, man," he finished holding up his fingers for two more shots.

Castiel put his hand on Dean's shoulder and leaned in closer to him, giving Dean that sort of sympathetic look Castiel has, and it worked a little bit. After 4 more shots and a few laughs, Cas left to do angel things and Dean walked back to the motel where the whisky really kicked in. Falling into bed, he uttered a small prayer under his breath to Castiel, "you mean everything to me, Cas."

Something wakes Dean in the night, a strange feeling, he sits up groggy and squints his eyes into the dark, yeah, still drunk. Unsure if he could stand up without swaying he stays firm on the bed and reaches under his pillow for his knife. Cas steps out of the shadows and Dean speaks slurred and quite gravelly, "oh, its jus' you, Cas," laying his head back down.

Cas walks over to the bed, looking down at Dean, he just stands there watching him rustle about. Finally he sits on the bed and feeling brave he leans close to an unmoving Dean and pushes his lips against his. Dean pushes him off with a muggy groan, but Cas didn't back down, gripping Dean's shirt in both his fists he pulled himself towards him and pressed his forehead to his. Again Dean retaliated with a shove trying to turn away and once more Cas pulled him back into a strong kiss.

Now Dean took the lead, rolling Cas over he clumsily climbed over and positioned himself on top of him. An inch separating them, breathing heavy, Dean squinted down at Cas looking guilty. Dean pressed his fingers against Castiel's face, running them through his thick brown hair and forced another kiss onto his lips before falling back onto his pillow and stumbling back to sleep.

Sam arrives back at the motel from the graveyard at around four in the morning, opening the door quietly, he see's Dean in bed whiskied asleep, "of course," he says quietly. And wait...what, there's another lump in the bed, "sure, I'm off working and he's here, boozed up and draped with a woman," Cas understands it's too dark for Sam to see him so he stays quiet and still, once Sam's fallen asleep he moves over to the table and just waits.

A ringing in his ear wakes him, Dean manages a low groan, out of the corner of his eye he see's Castiel sitting at the table, trying his best to avoid eye contact Dean grabs his coat and heads out the door, neither of them say anything. Sam was still knocked out in bed, he had a long night.

The ringing continues as an undertone, grumbling to himself as he shifts his baby into gear, he speeds off. "What the hell...no, stop thinking about it...yeah it was good...NO stop, it was Cas, he's your friend...but it was better than just good...STOP, think about something else. I have to do that stuff today...damnit.." The ringing raises in volume, it almost sounds like that time Cas tried to talk to him in his real angel voice. Ugh Cas..

Sam woke up to an empty room and a bright sun shining through the thin curtains. He shuffled over to the bathroom and splashed his face with water, walking back over to his bed he flipped open his cell phone to a missed call from Amelia, he ignored it and dialed Dean. No answer from Dean's end, "typical," he grunts, pacing back and forth he mutters to himself, "oh, you took care of the ghost yourself? Good job Sam, you're such a good hunter, and an even better brother in my time of need. Guess we better start looking for a new job and hit the road, no no, let me, you rest up!...yeah, thanks, Dean." Sam opens up his laptop and starts to search for a new job, they could probably hit the road by lunchtime. If Dean's back.

Dean showed up at the motel a few hours after that, grumpy as usual, unsure if he could face Castiel but know's he'll have to eventually.

"I took care of the ghost," Sam said, hinting at his desire for gratitude, "and I found another job, down in Louisiana."

"mph," was all Dean managed to say.

"I'm gonna head out...get some supplies..."

"mph."

Sam grabbed the keys from Dean's clutches and walked out the door. Dean stomped over to the bed and fell onto it, just as Castiel decided to pop in, but he just waited, because he knew Dean and he knew this would be the best.

After almost half an hour, Dean opens his eyes and says, "you're just gonna watch me? Kinda creep, Cas."

"It's up to you, what do you want me to do?" Cas replied calmly.

"Damnit Cas! I don't know!" Dean shouted, but Castiel wasn't startled.

"We can keep this between us..."

Dean stood up and walked over to Castiel, sitting in the chair adjacent to him and looked at him, the angel looked up and held his stare. Dean couldn't look away if he wanted to. Castiel reached forward and cradled Dean's face in his hands, Dean got quite nervous.

Cas spoke softly, "it's okay," over and over until the space between them closed and their lips touched lightly together. Cas pulled off his coat and moved to take off Dean's shirt, he obliged; Dean placed his hands on Cas' hips and together they fell into the bed.

"Actually, can we just..." Dean rolled his face into Castiel's neck and pulled in his scent, Cas rocked him. After a long while of silence Castiel turned to face dean and started to trace Dean's lips with his thumb. With a light smile, Dean reached up and pulled Castiel's hand away, down to his chest.

"Cas, I..." It took Dean a while to get things out but Cas waited and listened because Dean had that look on his face; lips curled in, eyebrows scrunched up, and eyes pleading at the angel.

"...Cas...you're my best friend," pressing his face into Cas' chest, refusing to look him in the eyes, Dean continued, determined, "I don't know what to say, I'm no good at this, you know. I just want you to know, it took me a while to get here, but...you're my angel, and you're not a complete pain in my ass," he finished stifling a laugh.

Castiel laughs and Dean feels his body shake against him, "thanks, Dean, that means so much," now Dean laughed with him. Castiel was just contagious like that.

The door swung open and hit the wall with a bang, Sam stepped in fast, "sorry, the wind!" He said, closing the door quick. When Dean looked up to find Castiel's face it wasn't there anymore. Sam gave him an odd look, "are you...are you naked under there?"

Dean pulled back a little, "no! My shirts off, it's warm in here," stopping himself before he said anything stupid, he quickly changed the subject, "your home sooner than i expected?"

"Oh God, you're not...you're not..._with_ yourself under there?! Should I leave?" Sam stuttered as he headed for the door.

"NO, Jesus. Calm down man, I don't need that stuff."

"Oh, right...good. Yeah i saw last night," he said flashing Dean a smile.

"Wha...what? Oh no Sam, it's not what you think, it wasn't..."

"Dude, it's no big deal, so how'd you find her?"

Her? He doesn't know it was Cas... a part of Dean is relieved but the other part wishes Sam just knew. "Oh, she was at the bar last night, it's no big deal."

"Well, I don't expect anything else, man, good on you," Sam said while taking off his jacket, "hey, is that Cas' coat? He never takes that off, when was he here?"

Dean's pupils grew to 90% and words started to stumble out of his mouth, but he had no where to go with them. "I...he...i have no clue...i haven't seen him...i mean thats my coat...yeah, yeah...well i mean it was the...alright you caught me. I JUST, i was drunk and i needed someone to comfort me, 'CAUSE i'm seeing Hell everywhere and it's torture. and it was ONE KISS and that's it, NO MORE HELL...right," he spit out, plastering a fake smile on his miserable face.

"what..." Sam managed to spit out, after a few agonizing moments, "I mean...what? ...You and CAS? Kissed?"

"It was one kiss, it's not like I love him or anything, HAH," Dean said very unconvincingly, his face in hysterics.

"Wait, you're 'seeing Hell everywhere'?"

"Yeah, but not since last night! Sam, you don't understand, Cas is.."

"Dean it's not a big deal, if he makes you happy, then I'm happy for you."

"No, seriously, Sam, listen. Cas is, yeah, he's my best friend and everything, but nothing will change and it won't end badly, 'cause I really care about him and he makes me happy! And...and...wait, it's not a big deal?"

"No! I'm more concerned about the Hell thing."

"Well, jeez, something big happens in my life and its just 'no big deal' to you," Dean scoffs.

"You're joking..."

"Yeah, I'm just messing with you. Let's go get a beer.

Dean couldn't be more proud of Sammy, he caught a young gal and was heading off to her place! What a special day, well, it only happens once in a while. And what better way to celebrate than to court my own man, and with that Cas appeared. Walking straight for his coat and putting it on, "nice, Cas," Dean snickered.

"Sorry," Cas mumbled.

Laughing, Dean replied, "it's okay, really, he was bound to find out sooner or later, this was better."

"I heard everything you said," Cas said, starting to blush, "I know how hard that must've been to say."

"I meant it," he said looking down at his feet.

"I know," smiling at each other they stepped closer.

Dean dragged Cas into what was meant to be a passionate kiss, but Cas knew what he wanted and retaliated with fast lips slamming into Dean, gripping his back and forcing his body in Dean's. Dean stumbled a little, eager to feel Castiel's body on his own he strung his fingers through Cas' hair and with a few powerful strides had him against a wall. In the next second Castiel's hands were pinned up against the wall and Dean was tugging at his bottom lip with his teeth.

Cas, feeling a bit overwhelmed and excited, dropped all his weight and let Dean control him. Dean took full advantage and soon dropped his hands to Castiel's hips pulling Cas into him. He removed Cas' coat and while Castiel's tongue traced the inside of Dean's lips he undid his tie. Castiel continued to run his own lips down Dean's chin to his Neck, lifting off Dean's shirt he continued down his chest, following each freckle, and dropping to his knee's. Dean closed his eyes and let his head fall back in anticipation, feeling Castiel's hands on the back of his thighs, his breath on his lower stomach, he knew he was getting excited. Castiel pressed his face into Dean's stomach and pulled in his musky smell, undoing his belt buckle, unzipping his pants, he could feel Dean's penis getting hard and couldn't help getting excited himself.

Castiel lifted himself off the floor quite gracefully, but didn't make a move more. Centimeters apart and only a couple layers of clothing between them, Dean's face grew smug, looping his fingers into Castiel's belt and pulling him closer - if even possible - and started to undo the belt along with his pants. Cas waiting patiently and Dean stared with a devious smirk.

Dean pushes Cas down onto the bed, roughly. Cas leans back resting on his arms waiting, Dean just looks for a moment, glowering in the moment and says fiendishly, "I'm starving." Exhaling hard he follows Cas onto the bed. Castiel feels his hands hard on his thighs, his hips, his chest as he climbs up his body. Dean's lips reach Cas' and its aggressive, but he makes up for it by reaching down Castiel's pants and using gentle strokes on his erect penis forcing Cas to let out a whimper and give Dean the excuse to smirk again.

Cas pulls his pants and briefs down to his knees and like a greedy child, Dean takes Cas' body pulling him up to his own lips, and with one light kiss Dean flips Cas over. Pulling his own pants down a bit, Dean spits on his hand to make the entry easier and slowly enters Castiel. Simultaneously they moan, breathing gets heavy as Dean trusts in and out; Castiel's hips grow weak and he buries his face into the bedsheets, gripping them tight. Dean grasps Castiel's shirt in a tight fist right below his neck and let's out a gasp. Castiel exhales heavily and feels Dean's body pull away, he turns around and looks at Dean, he says softly, "you're very beautiful."

Dean gives a quick laugh, lurches forward, hooking his arms around Castiel, and plants a quick kiss on him. Castiel falls back and Dean trails his fingers down Castiel's shirt, unbuttoning each button slowing, following with his lips. He wrapped his lips around the head of Cas' penis; using some hand and some mouth as he twists and licks. Looking Castiel dead in the eyes until Cas can't handle it anymore and drops his head back, crumpling the bed sheets in one clenched hand and pulling Dean's hair with the other hand. Cas lets out a low growl, ending with full inhale and a high pitched moan, Dean can taste Cas come in his mouth.

With a smile, Dean takes off his sock and wipes his mouth, kisses Cas, and falls onto him exhausted. Dean can see a bright shade of pink simmer on Cas' cheeks with the little bit of falling daylight.

"I've always felt we've had a special bond," Castiel said while placing his hand on Dean's left shoulder, the scar Castiel had left behind when pulling him out of Hell. Dean shuddered under his angels touch, folding into Castiel. Which Cas embraces because this is the first time Dean's opened himself up to such physical vulnerability.

Cas pressed his lips to Dean's forehead, sending a splash of ecstasy rolling through Dean's body, but the light touch faded as a knock came on the door.

"What?!" Dean yelled in his normal course voice.

"Can I come in?" Sam replied unsure.

Cas reappeared at the foot of the bed and said, "I suppose since Sam knows, I don't have to go."

Sam opened the door to see Dean under the covers but surely naked and Castiel standing by the bed naked as well. Without saying a word, he backed out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

Castiel looked at Dean, confusion covering his face, forcing Dean to laugh. Cas looked down at his vessels bare body, "this _is _how God intended things," Cas said making Dean shake harder with laughter.

Too fast to stop, the words "I love you," spilled out of Dean's mouth, causing his laughter to cease. In the next second Dean was staring into deep blue eyes, a face with no emotion, but eyes old enough to say it all.

"I love you, as well, Dean," Cas confessed. Relief fell over Dean who shot a quick half smile towards Cas before getting up to dress himself. As he leaned down for his jeans he saw Cas was already fully dressed, backwards tie and all.

Walking outside they found Sam on a bench a few feet from the impala. "Ready to go?" Dean asks Sam.

"Uh, yeah," Sam replied, avoiding eye contact.

Packing out the trunk, they jumped in and drove off. New hunt, old news; but this time was different, because Castiel wasn't about to fly off without warning anytime soon.


End file.
